Birthdays feel different when you’re a mom

Surrounded by Gemini women.

Going to start shopping in my moms closet…

I landed from Rome at 3 p.m. and somehow went straight to MetLife for the Beyoncé concert. (Full Dior cruise show + Rome breakdown is coming in a separate newsletter because it deserves its own moment).

It was my second time seeing the show but this time was special because I was taking my mom for her birthday. My mom kept pointing out all the references in Beyoncé’s visuals, which is full of nods to Black musical icons that she grew up with. At one point Beyoncé came out in gold fringe leather chaps and my mom casually dropped that she used to own gold fringe leather pants. I was like, excuse me, where are they now and how do I get them? Here I am spending hours of time on The Real Real when I should have just been looking in my moms closet lol. The next day was her actual birthday and we celebrated at Lure Fishbar which honestly has a much younger crowd than I remember. It was a fun energy for a place that’s been around for 25 years. A very New York kind of dinner.

The interesting thing about being an adult, especially a parent, is how birthdays change. You’re not looking forward to your birthday anymore really, you’re more so looking forward to celebrating the people you love instead. It’s a lot more meaningful. This year felt especially surreal because Claude and my mom are both Geminis, so I found myself planning a celebration for the woman who birthed me within days of honoring the little woman I gave birth to… not to mention I celebrated my dads birthday just a few days prior. I kept thinking about how I used to wake up to birthday surprises from my mom and now here I am staying up late, setting up balloons and tea parties for my own daughter. It’s a really emotional and humbling thing to see this arc of life so clearly within a single week.

The best gift = time

Now moving on to Claude. Sunday was all about her. The thing about having kids, especially once they start forming actual memories and opinions and little identities, is that the most valuable thing you can give them is your time. And that’s the one thing I constantly feel like I’m running out of. I carry a lot of guilt around that, like most working moms do. That feeling of being stretched thin, like you’re always half-showing up somewhere. To combat that guilt I make a really conscious effort to be fully present when I am with my kids: I put my phone away and I focus on them completely. I want the time we have together to feel special, intentional, and undivided. Obviously you guys are seeing me post with them, but that’s not in real-time and those videos are posted after the fact.

I really do try my best always but it still never feels like enough. And one little tradition I’ve gotten intentional about is including the kids in the celebration process. It’s so easy to just click and buy a toy or outsource every party setup but there’s something kind of hollow about that. I’ve found it feels way more meaningful to build the moment with them. I want them to see how joy is made instead of just handing it to them. And for siblings, it’s important to involve them as well. I actually brought Preston to the Lego store with me so he could pick out a present for baby Claude and it was so cute seeing him talk through all the options and figure out which one his sister would like the best.

…an easy birthday tradition

So on Sunday morning, Claude and I walked to a little local stationery shop to pick out birthday supplies. I had this vision of her waking up to a sweet little setup with a banner, balloons, a tea party for her stuffed animals, the whole nine, but I also wanted her to feel like she had a hand in it. There’s something really grounding in that I think. It’s a small but important balance I’m always trying to strike: letting her feel celebrated but also showing her the beauty in putting effort into something.

We had such a great day, one of those easy, slow Sundays that we don’t get enough of. After we got the kids ready for bed, I finally collapsed onto the couch around 11:30 p.m. and immediately realized I hadn’t set up anything for the morning. So I dragged myself back up, tiptoed around the apartment because my kids wake up super easily, hung the banner, arranged the tea party, and blew up a bunch of balloons. I filmed the whole thing of course (TikTok coming soon because… content).

Monday was her actual birthday and it was a bit of a whirlwind. I kicked off the day with yet another private school tour — my fifth, which probably deserves its own newsletter at this point — and then went straight to speak at a women’s leadership lunch at JPMorgan. We threw a little picnic for Claude in Washington Square Park that evening and the weather showed up for us in full, one of those perfect breezy spring days. Claude loved it.

By 8 p.m., I was horizontal and my eyes were literally twitching from exhaustion. But I woke up this morning having slept a full eight hours for the first time in what felt like a century. A birthday gift to myself, honestly.

P.S. These are all the vendors we worked with. Cake from @byclionyc bakery, custom cookies with Claude’s face on it Padoca Bakery, picnic by @perfectpicnicny, music by Ramblin’ Dan, and Joes pizza of course.

Hannah’s List Recs

• I find it harder to get dressed when it’s warm out because the outfit equations feel trickier. In the winter you can sort of get away with a long coat and leather boots but come summer, you can’t hide. So here’s my perfect summer formula: a black midi dress made from a soft fabric, a simple-but-still-a-statement necklace, a chic woven straw bag that fits the essentials, and retro cat-eye sunglasses. Obsessed with these Sézane finds in particular.

  

  Outfit from Sézane: Bianca sunglasses, Morgane necklace, Claude bag, Pippae dress

• Lots of DMs about this workout set. The sports bra and leggings are Alo but seems like they’re sold out in the yellow color. This and this alt from Athleta hits the mark though.

• …also got lots of DMS about my white pumps from pitch day with Conteur Capital. They’re from Maguire!

Side of the week: Crispy smashed potato salad

I’ve been seeing smashed crispy potatoes all over the internet lately and I used Be Well by Kelly’s recipe as inspiration for mine. Here’s what I did:

I parboiled the potatoes, then placed them on a sheet pan with olive oil, smashed them, and roasted them at 450°F for about 30 minutes until crispy.

While the potatoes were roasting, I chopped up cucumbers and celery. I also added bacon which was my own twist. Kelly uses barbecue chicken in her version, but I wanted something a bit different so I threw in lots of fresh dill. Tarragon and fresh chives would be great too.

For the dressing, I mixed mayo and Greek yogurt with plenty of lemon juice, lemon zest, dill, and a little garlic. I seasoned it with salt and pepper and kept tasting it as I went to get the flavor just right.

Once everything was prepped, I tossed the cucumbers, celery, bacon, and crispy potatoes in a bowl, added the dressing, and mixed it all together.

It was a total crowd-pleaser and everyone loved it. It would make an amazing side for any barbecue. It also holds up well in the fridge because the potatoes stay crispy but my rec would be to make sure you don’t overdress the salad.

I tend to eyeball everything so I don’t have exact measurements. My best advice: taste as you go. Especially with the dressing. Make sure it tastes great before mixing it into the rest of the salad.

Some of the links in this newsletter are affiliate. If you happen to buy something I might make commission.